Kinky Musing

Validation

by on Sep.18, 2013, under Relationships

For me I find that as a Top/Dom I too need validation. I need to know that in the end you enjoyed what I did to you. I need you to be gushing about whatever we did and I will return that back. If I don’t have that validation I find that I leave a scene wondering and spinning. Doubting if you had a good time. Doubting if I let the beast out too much or not enough. In the end, play will dissipate at the end.

I had a partner that I was having issues with. We would play and we would both walk away with a completely different perspective of how the scene/evening went. We were talking about four months after a particular scene and I made a comment about us not having a successful scene in a long time. She came back with well what about that scene when we were down south. It seems as though we both have a different opinion of how it went. She walked away thinking we had fun; I walked away thinking she just tolerated it. My recollection is that after we were done playing is that I never got any positive feedback. She never told me that I had a great time. Maybe she did and I never heard it. To this day I still don’t know what the real feelings were at the end of one of our last scenes. Which is sad to me because I do have some very found memory’s of our play in the beginning.

The more times this happens with a person the less likely I am going to want to play in the future.

So in the end, I need validation.


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